Newbie: +10
The narration of this book is certainly interesting, our narrator seems to use excessive and often misplaced punctuation, a prevalence of simple sentences and fragments that really negatively impacts the flow of prose. I was wondering whether these devices were intentional in portraying a psychological disorder, or just an indictment of a relatively inexperienced author.
Who the hell do you think you are? Criticism is fine and I would expect feedback that would help me improve and no I am not psychologically disturbed but I am a new author. God forgive you for being too cowardly to be out there to receive responses to your negative tirades!
David- I wonder if ‘J’ is actually implying the main character has a psychological disorder- hence the use of punchy, short sentences and lots of exclamation marks etc. ( I assume he/she means something like OCD or personality disorder, which given he is half accountant-half vigilante might be plausible!).
Take your point about wrong place for a review though- didn’t know profiles could be private either.
Aoppreciate your input Ross thinking about it you could be correct. I wrote this almost two years ago and was trying to stress the OCD nature of Steele’s personality. I also recall trying to emulate, to a degree the style of Raymond Chandler in that first section. Perhaps I was being a little over sensitive! Thank you.